Adoption Adventure

Our latest events

2008-11-29T22:10:00.007-05:00

It's been a while since our last update. Everything has settled into a routine and I am not much of a blogger so I guess every now and then I will find the time to post. I love these extended holidays and being able to stay home whole day. Victor loves mornings like these when mama and papa let him crawl into our bed and start mornings kissing each other. He is such an affectionate boy - I can't believe that just 7 months ago he didn't know how to hug.

We celebrated Victors 3rd B-day this month. What a day that was - he got so many gifts, he didn't know what to do with himself. He kept unwrapping and opening everything when guests came over rather than waiting till later during the party. He had a blast and slept for over 12 hours the next day. These pictures tell it all:

We also went on our first family outing to a spa which was 2 hrs away from home. He loved the pool and jacuzzi and even spent a minute or two in a hot sauna. And here is the proof...

We went to our 1st Disney Ice show and I probably loved it as much as Victor and his cousins. It was loud, it was fun and very colorful and we plan on taking the kids again in April.

And we had our 1st dentist appointment this month. What an experience that was... he would not let the doctor open his month. The hygienist barely got in there to put some white stuff on his teeth and that was it. We do have to get some work done on his further back teeth and will most likely have to do it under anesthesia, so I am not looking forward to that...

Other than these events, things have been pretty calm. Victor is a very smart kid and picks up on things quickly. I am amazed at how much he has developed over the past 7 months and is fully up to speed where he should be, except that he hasn't learned any English and that is because we are not teaching him yet. We want to make sure he has full grasp of Russian first and then transition on to English. He still has 2 years until he starts pre-K so we have plenty of time.

We also had our 1st family pictures and here are some of our cutie to end my update...

Guilty update...

2008-09-14T19:29:00.011-04:00

The title says it all - I am guilty big time for not updating our blog for so long. It's now been 4 months since we came home with our baby. It definitely feels like he's been ours forever and not just 4.5 months. We are very blessed to have our Victor and enjoy every minute of our busy days.

We've done some interesting things over the past 2 months and also learned a lot more about each other. Every day brings a new thing that Victor learns to do or says. He is a fun and happy kid, although we go thru behavior issues often. He is a little stubborn kid and doesn't always like when we are disciplining him. But he is still little and is learning. Given we've only been his parents for 4.5 months - I think we are doing OK. We definitely had to change ourselves and become more tolerant and patient.

We maintain daily routines to limit him getting over-excited. If he gets too excited throughout the day - he sometimes wakes up crying at night. I guess too many new things at once is a still a bit too much emotionally for him. Overall, he sleeps great and never wakes up at night unless he is crying. The one thing that hurts me is him asking for mama every morning. He walks into our bedroom every morning and asks Ruslan if I am there. Just breaks my heart... His eyes light up on weekends when he sees me in bed with daddy. I am as much happy to cuddle with my boys on weekends!

We are amazed every day at how smart and quick he is at learning. He is singing ABC song a million times a day - the tunes are engraved in my head permanently. Not all letters come our clear, but he sure tries to do his best. He knows "no", "funny", "ewe". We speak Russian to him all the time as I know he will learn English in kindergarten in no time. He loves reading story tales before bedtime. He knows probably 5-6 russian tales already. And I only have to read it one time before he picks it up. I start sentences and he finishes them next time we ready. Victor also loves music. He just freezes when he hears songs or tunes. We are thinking about starting music lessons with him in a year or two. He is so energetic all the time , so we want his energy to go into something that will keep him interested and busy.

He has become a very polite kid. He says please for everything. Even when he wants to run... such a funny boy. When he thinks he is done eating, he asks me "mama, spasibo?". Victor hears Ruslan saying spasibo (thank you) when we are done eating, and that is how Victor is asking me if he is done as well.

He repeats every single word we say. I can't believe he just started talking in Aug of 2007 per orphanage staff. You couldn't tell now he's just been talking a year. talks non-stop about anything that comes to his mind. He is also counting to 5 and knows basic colors.

We had a lot of new things over the past summer: a trip to the local lake, Hershey's park, big pool at the park. Next weekend we're going to a zoo - this for sure will be very exciting for our Vitya. And another big thing is coming up in 2 weeks. Ruslan and I are taking a week long vacation to Hawaii to celebrate our 10th anniversary. He'll be staying with our parents - I don't khow he is going to do without us and how we will handle our 1st time being apart.

And to end my update are some recent pics.

Young biker

I just need to grow a little bit to ride this one...

Fun at the water park

Hello to all from an airplane

With mommy

With a candy character - Vitya could not look straight he was so excited

But our daddy came out very handsome!

Summer pictures

2008-06-16T16:55:00.008-04:00

Our cuttie after a bath!!!! He loves his froggy...

Getting a ride on daddy's new bike... Mom doesn't really like that...

Our first trip to the pool! We had to borrow a girly swim-suit - the one we bought was too big for Victor.

Victor directing where daddy should swim....

Ruslan getting a break and doing the diving

I will post later about our life...

Brief updates

2008-06-05T16:30:00.006-04:00

We're nearing our one month anniversary this Sunday since coming home and let me tell you - I have no idea where this month went. It does seem like we've been home for a long time but at the same time I didn't get a lot of things done. Between work and chores at home - days are flying by.

Victor is a pretty happy guy so we don't have much to complain about, except some eating issues once in a while. He is sleeping well, getting along with everyone pretty well and is a great kid. He is being more and more affectionate - gives us hugs and kisses out of the blue. He tells us in Russian he loves us and we do the same throughout each day. It' just amazing how much kids learn with love and care!

He is making good progress on colors and counting 1 to 5. He loves repeating beginning and end of the ABC song that a few of his toys have. He gets very excited when he can finish it right on the spot as the song ends and has a big smile on his face each time. I get a kick out of Victor trying to repeat stuff we say in English - he definitely knows the difference between languages and things it's so funny when we're saying something he doesn't understand yet.

The other funny thing he does, he likes to call us mama Inna and papa Ruslan. When we don't respond to just mama and papa, he calls us by our names as well. It sounds very funny and he has a very serious impression on his face when he is saying it.

We had a visit to the pediatrician last week - all tests are normal, but we are going to see a pediatric dermatalogist about the rash on his face. We believe he is allergic to milk so hopefully they can confirm that.

We're spending a lot of time outside - we have almost 2 acres of land, so there is plenty of room to run around. One of the gifts we got was a gym set on the property and he loves it! We're planning to go to the pool this weekend, so we're looking forward to Victor's reaction. He loves taking daily baths in the bathtub and even tries to swim - so we're hoping he'll love a lot more water...

We're looking forward to this summer and enjoying a lot of new things with Victor!

2 weeks home

2008-05-23T16:01:00.006-04:00

We've been home for 2 weeks now and as you noticed by how often I blog these days - we've been very busy. Our fist and foremost attention goes to Victor of course who being an active toddler occupies mommy and daddy the whole day. I am just amazed at how well we all bonded. I feel like he's been ours forever and not just since April 22nd - exactly a month yesterday. We've experienced a lot of things for the 1st time over the past month and everything is going better than we hoped for. A true blessing from God we got!!!

Even over the past 2 weeks, we've seen Victor go thru a lot of changes. Visits to and by relatives would always end up in him crying when we had to leave, because he didn't understand that we'd be visiting or he'd be visited again by the same grandparents, uncles/aunts and cousins. Now that's he's seen everyone a couple of times, he knows everyone by name and has his favorites. He loves kids that are older than him. He is in love with my brother, Vlad. My sister's daughter adores him as well - he must have a charm with the little ones. Victor even calls other young men Vlad's name - he likes him so much. Every time my parents and my sister visit - he is asking for Vlad and we have to tell him that Vlad is studying at home. The funny thing is when Vlad comes over - Victor all of a sudden gets shy but very excited at the same time. He'd be hiding behind me, but laughing and jumping hysterically. So funny...

We've gone shopping a couple of times, together as a family and just me and Victor. He seems to like to go with mommy better. Daddy says he wants to grab everything off the shelves, so it's a little bit of a challenge to go with daddy. I know Victor needs to be occupied all the time, so as we walk by the isles - I have to tell him what we're going to get and then he helps me put in the cart or holds it. And every single time - he has to say out loud that he is helping mama. Such a helper I have... Same goes for helping me with cooking and doing the dishes. He just loves to help me in the kitchen! I know this will only last a couple of years if that, so I am cherishing these moments.

We've taken him to McDonald's once just to see if he'd like the food. The only thing he liked was french fries - he didn't want to try chicken nuggets or sandwich. We noticed that he doesn't like meat a lot for some reason. I think it could be that he is a little bit lazy and doesn't like chewing it. I end up breaking it into very small pieces so he can eat it. But he doesn't need any help eating big chunks of cucumbers, so maybe the meat "issue" is just a general dislike of something. He is a pretty good eater at breakfast and lunch, but rarely will he eat a full meal at dinner. He eats snacks after nap and before dinner, so I guess he is just not hungry. I haven't weighted him since we got home, but I am pretty sure he gained some weight as he feels heavier when I am picking him up.

We haven't had any behavioral issues lately, he obeys pretty well but is still a demand er once in a while. We just have to explain calmly why he is not allowed or should do something we ask him. He sleeps well by himself. Since we got home - he got up only twice crying and calmed down once mama laid down with him. He has a big queen bed so it's very handy when I or Ruslan have to lay down with him. He does like to go to sleep with me by his side: I have to sing a song or tell him a tale. But he falls asleep shortly thereafter and gets up in the morning and walks to our room. He'd call us at the beginning to come and get him, but now he is getting off the bed himself.

I am back at work for a week now, working a modified schedule, so Ruslan is baby-sitting our baby until nap time. Then I get home, everyone eats lunch and Victor is ready to nap. Our daddy goes off to work in his garage and I spend the evenings with Victor. It's such a joy to see him waking up all smiling and happy. He loves to hug and kiss, even randomly throughout the day. I'm so happy he learned to be affectionate to quick. He kisses and hugs his 4-5 year old cousins, and 9 months old cousin every time they see each other.

We've taken him to church every Sunday since we came home. The 1st Sunday - our church prayed for him. We were all nervous as he's never been in a place with so many people, but he lasted thru the prayer service (mom and day were praying, while he was on a floor playing with a car for a little bit). Our Sunday services are 2-3 hours long, so it's going to be a while until he can sit thru a service this long. But he is doing much better and every time we can stay a little bit longer until he starts running everywhere. We're so thankful to everyone who prayed for us and is still praying for us in our church and all of our friends, family and bloggers! Your prayers kept our spirit up when we were going thru difficulties and helped us keep that last hope we needed to wait for Victor.

I'll try to post more often so my posts are not this long. And here are some pics to end the post... Enjoy!

This us us at the airport on the day we flew home

Prayer service for Victor the 1st Sunday we got home

Victor and Irina - my sister's daughter - playing with dolls

Pictures from first days at home

2008-05-16T13:42:00.006-04:00

One of the gifts he got - a Mickey hat

Bath time..

Enjoying a ride to grandma's

Having fun in the laundry basket

Catching up

2008-05-15T16:18:00.004-04:00

We've been home for a week now and couldn't be happier!!! We are enjoying every day with our cute little son.

I did not post much after the court because we couldn't disclose some information at that time. The director let us pick Victor up for good the day after our court. Due to the holidays, we wouldn't be able to pick up the court decree until May 5th which meant 2 more weeks after the court of daily visits and heartbreaking. Mommy and Victor were crying almost every time we had to leave each other... So we asked the orphanage director if she'd let us take him the day after court rather than wait 2 more weeks and she said yes. Our donation helped as well...

So the new phase of our bonding began on Apr 22nd. The 2 weeks we had with Victor prior to leaving Ukraine definitely helped us bond and get used to each other a great deal. He was very comfortable to go places as long as we were with him. The 1st tension we had was giving him a bath. He was hysterically crying and not wanting anything that had to do with water. He must have been traumatized by the bath taking at the baby house. I remember that he mentioned to us a couple times during our visits that "Vituy kupali" - Vitya was given bath.. and I didn't understand why he was saying that, but now I know - he was complaining to us and looking for comfort. We figured out that he'd be comfortable taking a bath with daddy so it wasn't just him in the water and it worked wonderfully. By the 3rd bath taking - we couldn't get him out of the shower and he'd want to get back in after I wiped him. The transformation was huge... what a little bit of improvisation can do...

We tried sticking to his orphanage schedule and their menu, but it wasn't working... especially the menu. He didn't want to eat the baby food I'd cook, he wanted to try everything we ate so we decided to let him try everything. He loved cucumbers, yogurt and bananas - he'd eat these unstoppable if he could. And he loved to drink a lot. Poor kiddo would drink as if this was the last liquid on earth. We never saw what and how he ate, but we think the food was pretty boring and he was very eager to try new things. He has allergy from some food or ingredient, but the orphanage doctor couldn't tell us what it was. He is getting some rash and redness once in a while on his cheeks and we're going to check this out at our 1st dr's visit. But we are not giving him any candies or things that are too sweet, or citruses.

Days with him went by pretty fast. We spent a great deal playing outside, riding motorcycle with daddy - yes... I even have videos to prove it... Victor was afraid of our motorcycle at the orphanage, but once he got close to it at home, touched it - he immediately directed Ruslan to pick him up and sit on the bike. He loved it so much - he wouldn't get off without a lot of crying and screaming. Eventually Ruslan put him in front on the bike and gave him a ride on the street - and Victor was not afraid a bit. This boy is going to be an adventurer! Same thing happened with cars - once he was inside, he didn't want to come out without crying. He is fine now because he feels and sees the consistency - we take him with us and he knows mama's car is going to be there forever and we can go whenever, no need for crying and demands...

Back to Ukraine... We were able to pick up the court decree and get Victor signed out of the orphanage on May 5th. The office of birth records was off that day, so we had to wait till May 6th - Tuesday - to get his new birth certificate. That took 1/2 day and we still had to get passport done the same day in order to make it home on the May 8th. As of 5 pm on May 6th - we still didn't know if we'd make it. If we didn't make it, we could have been in Ukraine a lot longer. I called Lufthansa to inquire about possible departure date change and they said everything was booked until May 20th. I was on the edge... We were in the country for over 60 days now and 2 more weeks was not what we needed.

Our facilitator called and said that passport would not be ready until May 7th - Wednesday and that almost broke my heart. That would mean that we wouldn't make it back to Kiev to get medical and visa done before our 2 pm flight on May 8th. I called her back and explained what Lufthansa told me and she had to call AVIR (passport) office back. Earlier that day she dropped off the application and "fees" but the lady didn't look how much our facilitator put in the envelope. When she called that lady back and explained how important it was for us to get the passport today - she said Ruslan can come and sign for the passport in 15-20 minutes. The "fees" in the envelope made a big difference. Ohh.. the news just made my day. Ruslan rushed on the motorcycle and made it just in time before they closed for the day. We had Victor's passport in our hands and were all ready to go.

We took an overnight train back to Kiev. He took it pretty well, was kind of excited to go on the train. Slept thru the night, but fell on the floor once so we had to put something underneath once side of the mattress so he doesn't roll to the floor. We were at the medical clinic before they open and were out of there on our way to Embassy by 11 am. We got everything dropped off at the Embassy and were told to come back for the visa the next morning.

We were going at 100 miles/hour just a day ago, and now everything seemed to finally calm down. We got done with the last paper chase and would be coming home very soon. As I said earlier, Victor was very good going everywhere since we were there all the way. We did have a few crying and legs kicking, but that is usually for a toddler. He did very well considering how many new things he saw and went through in the last few days.

We picked up his visa in the morning and took him to the SDA to drop off a copy of the court decree for their records. The psychologist - Oksana and her manager - Marina - were glad to see him. They knew very well what we had to go through and asked if we were still mad at the them. Of course we said no - there was a reason we had to go thru all the stress and pain - God had a plan for us to meet our son - Victor. After a brief meeting, we were off to the airport. The flight departed timely to Frankfurt and then we got on a flight to Washington, DC 15 minutes prior to departure. Victor slept half way through both flights, but barely ate anything. He was a bit cranky and that was understandable - it was after midnight Ukrainian time and he wasn't laying in his bed.

We made it to Washington on time, but it took us over an hr to get thru passport control and immigration. There were lines everywhere and not enough personnel to get everyone through. We were drained physically... I haven't slept for 2 nights and Victor was wanting to go everywhere he shouldn't... What a relief it was to come thru the doors and to see our family. We were met by my parents, my 2 sisters and one sister's husband, brother, our niece and Ruslan's mom. Ruslan's dad and stepmom were at our house waiting for everyone to arrive. Irina (our niece) gave Victor a handful of balloons, a teddy bear and an elmo cell phone. He didn't know what to do with himself - so many people were wanting to hug and kiss him, and he got gifts right away. Ohhh... It was a great feeling to see everyone and to finally touch down on American ground. It felt as if we were gone for a year rather than 2 months.

The drive home went pretty quick, although I kept falling asleep and waking up every so often. Ruslan drove us back - not sure how he had the energy.. but we made it home around 11 pm. Our house is a small ranch house, but it seemed so big, super clean and the best house in the world. Victor got so many gifts - full room of toys, full closet of cloth and of course the best grandpa's, grandma's, uncles, aunts and cousins in the world.

More updates from our 1st week home to come later.. Thanks everyone for following us throughout this journey and praying for us along the way.

We are home!!!!

2008-05-10T21:48:00.003-04:00

We made it home this Thursday! What a great feeling to finally be back at home - seemed like I was in another world...

Sorry for the gap in updates, but things got moving so quickly that I didn't even have a chance to update our blog. And we didn't have internet for a portion of the last 2 weeks. I promise I will fill in all the details next week once we settle in and I catch up on things.

Day 8...

2008-04-29T08:56:00.005-04:00

Today is day eight of our mandatory 10 day waiting period. Time is definitely going fast and I can't wait for everything to be finally over. Our little one is blossoming every day and I feel like the luckiest mom in the world.

I don't have much time to post right now, but here are some recent pictures.

We had a court today

2008-04-21T14:35:00.002-04:00

We are officially Victor's parents!!! We had our court today and the waiting period begins. Because of the holidays - Easter and Labor Day here, we won't be able to pick up the official decree until May 5th. It ends up being 14 days instead of 10...

We weren't able to visit Victor in the morning because of the court and poor baby was waiting for us all morning. Nannies told us he was playing outside and kept looking at the gates and entrance for his papa and mama. Ladies from the Sunday shift forgot to let ladies from this morning know that we weren't going to make it this morning. They were excited to learn we had the hearing today and kept asking when we'll be able to pick him up. We would have picked him up that moment if it was up to us.

The weather in Odessa is very nice these days and kids are finally wearing spring like cloth. Up until 2 days ago, Victor was wearing a winter hat - poor kiddo. We bought him a spring hat but he is so used to his old one that he would not put it on for more than a few minutes. Today, they brought him out in a spring hat and we let him take that off - it was too hot to be wearing a hat.

Our visits continue to be very interacting and he is opening up and learning more and more each day. We learn new words, new colors and numbers and he clearly remembers everything the next day. When we first met him, the only number he kept saying was "odin" - one. Now his favorite number is "tlee" as he says it which is three. He also seems to like "tlinatzsat" - thirteen. I remember I was measuring him and asked Ruslan to write down 13 for some measurement and now Victor keeps saying it every time he sees a measuring tape - very funny how kids pick up words and associate them with objects.

We enjoyed watching him play in the sand box for the past 2 days. You should have seen the joy on his face. I don't think they're ever allowed to play in the sand, at least the younger ones are not since it's not around their play area. He was jumping, screaming with joy and throwing sand outside the sand box. It was hallarious! He also likes to copy older kids. He won't repeat what they're doing right away, but after some time he'll do exactly what he saw someone older do. Today he kept standing up on the swing as he saw a 4yr old do earlier. He doesn't seem to be afraid of heights or danger. When we take him on the slide, he throws himself into Ruslan's hands not even checking if it's safe. I'm so afraid he's going to fall and hurt himself. Ruslan says all boys are like that - they have to try everything and learn: whether it's eating the sand (which I'm watching out for) or falling off the slide and learning to be safer.

I don't have any new pics to post, but will post in the next day or two. Thanks everyone for following our journey and warm comments.

8 Wonderful days have passed

2008-04-18T14:29:00.003-04:00

As the title of this blog is suggesting - 8 wonderful days have passed since we met our little boy. We cannot be happier!!! The transformation from day 1 is dramatic and it seems that we've known him a lot longer than 8 days.

A good part of each day is taken up by driving back and forth and visiting him twice a day. The one day we didn't get to visit him in the evening, I cried at home... I want to take him home as soon as we officially can. And every day it's harder and harder to leave him there.

He is picking up on our affection and is giving us hugs and wants to be held. You can definitely tell these poor kids have not been kissed and hugged a lot if at all. Whenever I hold and kiss him for long time - he freezes and listens to what I am doing. We will make up on the last 2.5 years of missed love for sure. He is also showing a little bit of protection and jealousy over his mama and papa. Today, when another boy entered their dressing area - he promptly told him to go away and shut the door. He did not want to share his mama with anyone.

We spend most of the time outside since the weather lately has been nice. He runs and falls a lot, but never cries. Sometimes he waits for us to pick him up, but gets back up and continues running. I'll have a ton of laundry to do at home with this bunny. We enjoy learning his personality a lot, and although we can't really discipline him - we still try to be parents and tell him what he cannot do. He is testing us once in a while and looks at what we're going to do if he tries to go somewhere he is not allowed.

Everyone notices how much he adores his papa. There are not many men around them and the ones they see - they call uncle (dyadya). Everywhere we go, he tells papa to go with him. And if he sees Ruslan going somewhere - he starts to get worried. At first he was calling Ruslan "dyadya" and we'd tell him it's not "dyadya" - it's papa. The next day he'd forget and say "dyadya" and then promptly correct himself with papa afterwards. Now it's always papa and he even calls me papa sometimes rather than mama - I guess he gets in the moment.... So every visit is a joy for us and for him of course. Nannies say he knows when we're coming and is very excited to let everyone know we're coming.

We were hoping for a court this week, but SDA did not issue their approval until yesterday, so our court is scheduled for Monday, April 21st. That's one of my niece's b-day. Happy B-day Irina!!!

After court, we will have to wait 10 days to pick up the official court decree. We then will be able to start on the new birth certificate and passport. Thanks for all the comments and thoughts. And here are some pictures to end the post...

Walking together with daddy

We're trying out a new hat

Getting measurements so mama can go shopping - what a challenge measuring was... he thought it was a toy and kept saying "otdai, moy" - give me, mine

Some pictures

2008-04-13T05:57:00.003-04:00

That's three of us on the day we met

Our son trying out daddy's helmet

Playing with a new car

Enjoying a banana

First experience of bonding

2008-04-12T15:43:00.002-04:00

We've now been able to visit our son for 2 1/2 days and the bonding is going very well. When he was first brought into the director's office - he was hysterically crying and scared. He got a haircut right before our meeting, was put into new cloth and taken to an office he's never been before - poor baby... He had no clue what was going on and why all those people were looking at him. He would not let go off his nanny's shoulders so we ended up following them back to his groupa, where he would be in a familiar atmosphere.

For the first 5-10 minutes he was looking at us very skeptical. Nanny kept saying here is your mama and papa, but he would not budge. We started talking to him, but he would not say a word. Shortly, we were able to pick him up and sit in their playroom area. He warmed up a little bit and started playing with toys and pointing to things and naming them.

Their groupa was heading outside, so we helped him dress and went to play outside. He really enjoyed holding both of our hands and going to different playgrounds that his groupa never went to. First thing we noticed, was his interest in anything that moves - trucks, cars, motorcycles. As soon as he'd see one, he got very excited and kept saying "machina" (for car) or "ticle" (for motorcycle). He is a very active boy, loves going on the slide and run around.

Our next two visits went even better - every time he sees us now he is smiling and calls us mama and papa. We had our first cry on our 3rd visit - we played inside and took him back to his groupa after the alloted time. As soon as he realized we were leaving, he started crying and calling mama. It was heartbreaking... We hugged him and said we'll be back tomorrow. My poor baby was already missing us. I was telling Ruslan earlier on Friday that we should start seeing crying next week as a sign of bonding and attachment, and we weren't expecting it that early but it's a good sign and I am very happy that he doesn't want us to leave.

He cried again today when we came for the morning visit. He saw us and wanted to run towards us, but his nanny would not let him go because we had to tell his doctor we were in for a visit. He thought we were leaving and started crying. I had to come and calm him down, while Ruslan went to the doctor. He would not stop crying because his papa left so I had to explain that papa will be back and sure enough he was fine only once papa got back.

He is a very smart boy! He plays with crayons and organizes them by color, with all tips up before putting them back in the box. He says almost all basic words and understands everything we say. He is a bit demanding, but listens if we say no. We are getting to the baby house by a motorcycle, so we have our helmets with us. Our son is obsessed with helmets, he drops everything and runs to put them on. So our daddy will enjoy someone else other than him being interested in bikes and cars. His nannies say that he is everyone's favorite and everyone adores him. Of course they do - he is the sweetest and smartest toddler in the world!

As for our paper chase... We are hoping for a court date next week. We are going to have to stay here an extra week due to Easter falling the last week of April and a lot of government offices closed for that whole week. Hopefully time flies by and we are home soon.

We found our son!!!!

2008-04-10T12:52:00.000-04:00

Today was the best day of our 38 days in Ukraine!!! We met our son and he is the one. It was so worth the wait. We made our decision as soon as we saw him and the paperwork is already in the works.

He is a sweet 2 yr old boy in Odessa orphanage # 3 - the Sun. The director and all the staff were very great and welcoming. We got to spend over an hr with him today inside and outside. We did not make it for the afternoon visit because we had to get some documents notarized and it took forever - almost 2 hours for 2 one page documents.

We will be visiting twice a day starting tomorrow. Ohh... I can't even describe what I am feeling right now! All the prayers have been answered and more than we wished for! God did have a plan for us, we just had to patiently wait for it to happen at the right time. This little boy is from Odessa, which is where Ruslan is from and is close to everything we know. We always wanted to adopt from the same region/place.

I can tell you that all of this of course is God's blessings first of all, but it also happened because someone at SDA really cared about our situation. And it was the psychologist that we had at our 1st appointment. When we spoke back on March 6th - she really meant to find a child for us, but there were no "reasonable healthy" children then. She promised we would be called back when she finds a good file, but then she went on sick leave and did not come back until last week. As I said in the last post, we had no hope left after meeting with the SDA so many times but God is caring and gave us our long awaited for son.

Thank you for all your warm comments and sharing your stories. We will be in touch with updates.

This might be it...

2008-04-09T03:54:00.000-04:00

What a crazy day we had yesterday. We got a call from our facilitator late on Monday night letting us know that SDA is inviting us for another appointment on Tuesday. They did not say what the appointment would be about - giving us another referral or sending us home.

For those who are following our blog - you know that this was our 4th appointment at the SDA which is rare. On our 1st appointment we were not given a referral due to lack of anything good to offer by the SDA. Our 2nd appointment resulted in a referral to visit a boy in Torez which we rejected upon learning the true health condition of the child. On our 3rd appointment, we were sent to Kharkov to meet a brother and a sister, which to our disbelief the director would not let us see because a foster family had already made a contact with them. So technically, we only saw a child once and we think that is why we were given one last chance.

We were hoping SDA would decide on our case on Monday and we got our answer. But it was very close that we almost did not make it... At 7pm on the day you have to leave - it is almost impossible to get an overnight train ticket, so our only option was by an overnight bus. We rushed to the bus station to make sure we can get a ticket to get to Kiev. We were able to purchase our tickets just in time! Around 6 am we were in Kiev, but we did not sleep all night... Anyways, we wanted to save money so we did not rent any place to stay for the day - we just toured the city and waited for our 4 pm appointment.

We had a couple of talks with other facilitators while waiting for our facilitator and our appt and I will share some interesting discussions we had for those who are submitting or waiting for an appt at a later time. At the appointment - we were shown 3 files. A 2 yr old boy and two other files with boys 9 and 11 years. It seemed that they pretty much decided that we should accept a 2 yr old because they did not show anything else. The older boys are way too old for us - we've only been married for 9 years... and I would have been way too young of a mom at 26 with a 9 or 11 year old.

The 2 yr old boy is located in Odessa, only 10-15 miles from where we currently live. He does have some medical issues which are not severe but he is not totally healthy. We believe he is in the orphanage called Sun - "Solnishko". We traveled back to Odessa once again on the bus and got home around midnight. We originally were going to depart at 10 pm since we didn't know how long the appointment would take, but we were able to re-book to a 6 pm departure with minutes to spare. Ruslan had to run to the bus driver and tell him that I am changing our tickets and for them not to leave without us.

We now had a well rested night and are gearing up to meet the boy tomorrow. Our facilitator will be picking up our referral document and traveling to Odessa today on an overnight train or bus. We're hoping this time SDA prints the correct information on the referral - the last two had wrong orphanage and wrong location... which caused more delays along the way.

Going to this appointment, we really did not hope for anything. We talked to another couple that was sent home without a 3rd appointment and we were not optimistic. But I know that God does have a plan for us and maybe this boy is meant to be ours. So if everything works out, we will be in Odessa for another 3-4 weeks. We were originally coming home on the 14th and will have to guess a new date if we decide to accept this referral. If it does not work out - we will be home on the 14th.

We thank you all that are praying and thinking about our family. May God bless you!

We will update on Thursday once we get to see the boy.

Not much to report

2008-04-04T14:07:00.000-04:00

Thank you to all of you who are praying about us. It really means a lot to know that so many strangers care about our situation. Your comments and thoughts help us get through some of the toughest times of our lives.

We waited all week for an update from SDA and unfortunately as of end of the business day today - still nothing new to report. Our facilitator was able to meet with the officials on Tuesday and SDA agreed to consider giving us another appointment, but no word of when that will be and what will be shown. We are hoping once again to get a final decision on Monday.

If they only have sick children to offer - we will not be going back to Kiev. While visiting the last orphanage we saw a lot of healthy children and SDA offering only sick children is non-sense. Out of a group of 10-12 children we saw only 2-3 that looked sick or delayed. Majority of 4-6 year olds we saw playing outside were very active and healthy.

We were ready to come home this weekend, but the possibility of one more chance that might bring us closer to meeting the child(ren) is still there. We are currently staying in Odessa, waiting to get called back to Kiev if anything changes.

We don't want to leave if there is that slim chance of coming home with the child(ren). We are praying for God's will in our situation and hope next week will bring closure to our mission in Ukraine.

It's been a long week

2008-03-28T09:46:00.000-04:00

I know people have been checking our blog for an update, so I am finally ready to post. So much happened during this past week and I could write a whole book on what we've been through and everything we feel right now.

We had our 3rd appointment at the SDA on Monday afternoon. We were shown a lot of files and all were with sick kids, some very sick, some older than we were looking for. We selected to visit a brother and a sister - 500 km from Kiev. Without getting into too many details, which I will share at a later time - we did not get a chance to see the children. The referral letter was once again incorrect, 2nd time in a row from the SDA. The orphanage director would not let us see the children because a foster family already had a contact with them a few days prior to our arrival.

Two days later, this still has not been resolved. A lot of local government offices had to get involved to resolve the situation, but as everything in Ukraine - we have no idea when it would be resolved and a permission by the director to see the children would be granted. We have decided that these children are not meant to be ours - so many obstacles are/were in our way. We have given that foster family priority since they already had a contact with the children. We did not want to traumatize the children as they already know these people as their parents that are coming for them.

My heart is aching and crying - we've put so much effort, time and feelings into this journey. And now, almost 4 weeks later - we are still at point zero. Most of what happened with this referral is not our fault - we came to see the children with open hearts, but were denied the opportunity. We prayed and asked for God's will, and to this day I try to understand why God is letting us go through so much pain. As Chistians, we know that God doesn't give us more than we can handle and loves us more than we can love Him. We saw so many children at the orphanage playing outside. All of them were asking us whose papa and mama we were. Some children were saying that they want a family. I cry every time I recall their eyes looking up to us asking why isn't anyone coming for them...

Our facilitator is trying one last time, pleading for SDA's understanding, given the circumstances of the last referral. We will know early next week what their decision is and if we will be given another chance. But I don't know if we can handle seeing another sick child or dealing with more mistakes made by government. We are emotionally drained and have very little hope left for anything better.

Please pray for us to see the light in this very dark tunnel...

Pictures

2008-03-22T11:03:00.000-04:00

This is Ruslan next to the statue that is in front of the SDA office

This is us at the Odessa port

This is our facilitator Tatiana and I

2008-03-21T11:23:00.001-04:00

Thanks for all the warm and kind comments. It really means a lot that so many people are praying for us. We went to the SDA 1st thing this morning to discuss what happened with the referral. We gave them all the facts and once again presented a letter requesting another appointment and a referral for a healthy child(ren) under 5 years old.

We are supposed to be getting a phone call regarding our last appointment today which I doubt will happen. We were told we would be re-invited on Monday or Tuesday of next week but that it is very unlikely that we would be presented with a totally healthy child.

I don't know how many other families are in Kiev right now waiting for 2nd/3rd appointment, but from other facilitators at the SDA - everyone is pretty much mad and upset with the current situation at the administration and availibility of children. SDA is contradicting what local orphanage directors are saying. Inspectors and directors at the local level are saying there are a lot of healthy children that are adoptable, but somehow their files either never make it to the SDA or SDA is never showing these kids to foreigners. Therefore, closing the doors for these children to ever get a chance to have a family.

Yes, Ukrainians are adopting more kids these day but very few as compared to foreigners. We see a lot of ads on TV and on billboards in Kiev and Odessa - government advertising kids that need families. Yet, people like us who come to Ukraine with open arms and hearts to give love to a child are told we can't adopt these kids. Everyone we talk to cannot understand how there is not a single child for us in the whole country. It's something I can't understand either.

Ukraine is a non-Christian country so what else can you expect from a government that believes they are God and ordinary people are nobody. These children desperately need love and care we all can give them, so we are doing everything that we can. God is Mighty and can work miracles, so I still have hope left for next week. But if not - He knows why He led us to Ukraine and what He is trying to show and teach us through this.

Sorry for all the negativity, but we're just plain sick and tired of nothing working in Ukraine. There are no systems and controls from what we see. They make ordinary people jump through hoops to get a simple thing done. But this experience made us appreciate where we live a lot more. We are thankful to our parents who brought us to America to have a great life we have.

Painful day

2008-03-20T10:35:00.000-04:00

I can't even begin to describe what we are feeling right now. We rejected the referral. This handsome boy is mentally delayed and has other major health problems we were not told. If we knew all the information at the SDA - we would have never even accepted to come and see him. We were lied to and told that this boy is the best they have to offer and this boy is currently at Torez, an internat for severly mentally disabled children and has been there since June of last year. We were told he is in Mariupol in a normal orphanage and found out that this was not the case late in the evening once we got to the train. Too late to change anything...

The local inspector and the orphanage director could not believe SDA did this to us. They thought we specifically requested a mentally disabled child. I'm angry at the administration and their careleness. They knew we are a young couple and that we wanted a healthy and young child(ren). We were told to come back tomorrow to discuss the mess they've created. I don't know what is going to happen and what options we will be given.

This is the hardest thing I ever had to experience. I cannot understand why something like this happened to us. We always thought SDA would be willing to help us since we are Ukranians, but it seems that they have a different agenda.

Please pray for the next steps we have to take. If our next meeting doesn't work out - we will be coming home without a child which is just breaking my heart. God is our only hope at this point.

What a great day!

2008-03-18T18:26:00.000-04:00

We had our 2nd appointment at the SDA today at 3 pm. My heart raced and my whole body was shaking as much as during our 1st appointment. I know God is overseeing everything and He already had everything planned out, but our human nature still intervenes very often.

We arrived 5 minutes before our appointment to find a lot of people standing in line inside and groups of people outside. They were all submitting documents and waiting to get called in. We also saw a couple that had appointment on the same day as us 2 weeks ago. They too had their 2nd appointment and I think they got a referral as they seemed happy afterwards.

We were invited upstairs by Oksana, a new psychologist. She was present at our 1st appointment that was led by Valentina. I guess Valentina was training Oksana as we didn't see her at the SDA today. Oksana was very welcoming and nice. She had 2 files of boys for us on top of our folder. She spoke to us in Ukrainian, they did not allow for our facilitator to come in as we understand Russian/Ukrainian and Ruslan also speaks Ukrainian. I understood most of what she was saying in Ukrainian but asked in Russian.

They showed us a file of a 3 yr old and a soon to be 5 yr old boys. We also asked for a siblings group under 5 yrs old, but were told no healthy ones were available, only kids a lot older. The 3 yr old boy has crossed-eyes and a minor issue with lip which might require cosmetic surgery. The psychologist then proceeded to describe the 5 yr old boy. As soon as we saw a picture of him, we felt in our hearts that he is the one. His blue eyes and beautiful smile were charming and I think he even looks like Ruslan a bit. He doesn't have any health issues other than possible developmental delay. Oksana said that he is best file they have to offer. His file came off the registry on the 14th which was last Friday. God's timing couldn't be better! Although 2 weeks have gone by since we came to Ukraine, we wouldn't be able to see this boy's file prior to this week.

We are heading to Mariupol tomorrow evening via an overnight train to Donetsk, and then a drive to Mariupol. We will be meeting this little boy on Thursday. Once again I want to thank all of you who were and are praying for us. This experience is proving once again that God has better plans for us that we can expect. We are very thankful to everyone who is thinking and praying about us.

Update from Kiev

2008-03-17T07:06:00.000-04:00

We are back in Kiev, arrived from Odessa this morning. We were waiting for "the phone call from SDA" all last week and our facilitator was told to call the next day all week long. They finally assigned a 2nd appointment for us tomorrow afternoon. The only hope we have left is that God waited this long for a reason and we need to be patient. I truly hope tomorrow is a better day than our 1st appointment and SDA has new files to show us. Please pray for us; we will try to post after the appointment. And a BIG thank you to all of you who is praying and keeping us in your thoughts. The past 2 weeks have been tough emotionally and all of your thoughts and prayers really mean a lot to us.

Not so good news....

2008-03-08T09:53:00.000-05:00

Sorry for not being able to post right away. We had our appointment on Thursday. We were not shown any files with healthy children under 4 years old and were told to request a 2nd appointment. We are hoping we get called back next week as the SDA is closed for Women's Day (March 8th) until Tuesday of next week.

Although it was frustrating and sad that we didnt' get to chose a child on our 1st appointment, we believe everything is in God's hands and we have to be patient. I know a lot of people are praying for us and we have faith God will lead us through this experience.

We left for Odessa Thursday evening to visit Ruslan's friends and relatives. We know for sure that we will not be called back until Tuesday so we will be staying in Odessa until then. It's a lot warmer here than in Kiev so we are enjoying the warm weather. We are hoping to hear back from SDA next week. Please continue to pray for us. We will post again next week once we hear something from the SDA.

Update from Kiev

2008-03-05T05:59:00.000-05:00

We finally got to an internet cafe to update all of you who are following our blog. We arrived safely and are now enjoying our time in Kiev. Our flight was OK, we arrived on time to Germany and then on to Ukraine. We filled our forms promptly, got the baggege and were the first ones in line for customs. It always helps to be the first ones, so the customs' officers don't hold you up because of a long line building up from everyone checking out at the same time. The customs' guy asked us a couple times if we declared all the cash we were bringing - I guess it was a lot of money to them. I was hoping they wouldn't go thru our luggage and they didn't.

We were met by our facilitator, Tatiana and her husband, Aleksandr. They drove us to the church where we are staying. It's a church they go to, which is located close to the center of Kiev. They have one floor of the building for hotel stay and we are renting one of the rooms. It's nothing fancy, but it does have a bed, small fridge, bathroom (with hot water) and a small living room area.

We quickly took a shower and went off walking to eat somewhere. Tatiana told me about a restaurant "Puzata Hata" which means house with big belly. They have a variety of food to select from: you just walk thru the food bar and pick what you want. Our total meal was around $10 and we were pretty full. We then walked back to our place and by that time we haven't slept for 24 hrs and were walking zombies. As soon as we got back, we went right to sleep. And that was a mistake... We woke up at 2 am after getting 8 hrs of sleep and couldn't fall back asleep. I reorganized our suitcases and Ruslan spent some time learning our cell phone functions. We then read the Bible and tried to fall back asleep but couldn't, so after 2 more hours of this - we decided to go to a grocery store to buy some food and to eat breakfast somewhere. There was no one on the street at 5:30 am to ask for directions, so we just walked and walked until we ran into a woman who told us how to get to a 24 hrs supermarket. We must have walked for an hr - don't even know how many miles... only to find out that the supermarket is closed. It does say they're open 24 hrs, but the doors were locked and no one was inside. I guess this stuff happens in Ukraine. So it was 6:30 am and we were desperate to find a place to eat, so we continued walking. We ended up at "Kreschyatik" but all cafes and stores were closed. And then we saw a Coffee House restaurant. It's a Starbucks style cafe, except they serve food and drinks. But, since we knew it was a fancy place we had to have at least 100 ghryvnas (Ukranian money), but we didn't have enough since we didn't exchance more money last night. So, we ended up using our Visa - luckly it all worked and we got to eat.

We did find a 24 hr supermarket almost right next to this Coffee House and got some small stuff to eat for later. We got back to our room around 7:30 am and went for a prayer service at 8 am at that church. It was such a blessing to attend their short service. There weren't a lot of people since most people work on work days, but we know this church was praying for us even before we came and it was a blessing once again to hear how much they all cared about us and our needs.

We learned from our facilitator that our appointment is tomorrow at 10 am. Please pray for us and for God to help us chose the child(ren) He has prepared for us. I know that some recent appointments are not going well, but we know that God takes care of His children and we are looking forward to tommorrow.

We haven't been able to find a Wi-Fi place yet, so I can't use my laptop and this internet cafe is a long distance from where we're staying. I am hoping to find a place closer so I can post every day. Depending on how tommorrow goes, we might be leaving for the region tomorrow evening and might not be able to post right away. But we will try our best to give everyone the news as soon as possible.

I apologize for any spelling mistakes - the spell check function does not work on this computer for some reason. Tommorrow should be a wonderful day for us!

I will post our phone number somewhere on the page.

And we are off to Ukraine...

2008-03-03T10:46:00.001-05:00

The day has come, we are all packed and ready to go. We're leaving for the airport in about an hour. We'll be departing from Washington DC via Lufthansa Air.

Given there are no delays, we will be arriving in Kiev on Tuesday afternoon their time and morning our time. Our appointment is on Thursday so Wednesday will be a free day for us.

Please keep us in your prayers. We will be in touch once we're settled in.

Few more to go...

2008-02-26T22:51:00.001-05:00

Well, it's now only 5 more days to go. We leave on Monday at no on for Kiev. Tomorrow I'll be trying to get all of our stuff into the suit case and a duffel bag. Everything we plan on taking has been purchased. I got another set of an apostilled dossier done last week just in case we'll need it. The one thing I'm still debating is how much warm cloth to take. It seems that spring in Europe comes beginning of March and it gets warmer pretty quick. I'm hoping that is the case this spring.

We we are having a family gathering on Sunday for everyone to come to our house and pray together. This experience will be nothing we ever experienced and the power of prayer really means a lot to us as Christians.

I will post again before we leave. Only a few more days to go... I can't wait to finally start this awesome journey!

20 More Days...

2008-02-11T21:23:00.000-05:00

We're getting closer and closer and the excitement is definitely building up. I've gotten most of the items on my list to do accomplished except a few little things. The list of items to take along is 3/4 done although we have not started packing yet. I am guessing that will be during the last 1-1 1/2 week.

I am really hoping for a warmer spring in Ukraine so that we don't have to take a lot of warm clothes, but with that comes more muddiness and foggy weather. We bought our first children toys over the weekend. I tried to think of what kinds of toys our nieces play with and got a little bit of everything. And here are our some of our nieces:

Irina - my sister's girl

and Evelina - my husband's brother's girl

They are both very sweet girls and we love them both! I can't wait till they have cousins (our kids) to play with all the time.

We're planning on finishing buying the rest of what we want to take for the child(ren) next week. We're going to be taking a doll and cars since we're not sure whether it will be boy(s) or girl(s). We'll donate whatever we don't end using to other kids.

I think the reality is starting to kick in... we're so close to finding out who the gifts from God are! I am so looking forward to this rewarding experience. I am sure there will be obstacles along the way but with God overlooking our ways - we are in the best hands ever.

Getting it done

2008-01-21T20:41:00.001-05:00

The time is creeping up on us. We finally were able to clear up one of the rooms for the child(ren) which will eventually become either a bedroom or a playroom. We've moved everything to the finished basement so that's where our family room will be from now on. We ordered new furniture and will still need to move our office down to the basement as well. The plan is to have 2 complete rooms ready to go and we'll just need to finish some small things around the house.

Ruslan and I were just talking the other day how we vividly remember Oct 1st when our dossier was submitted and it seemed like it would be forever till we finally travel. But now we mention to each other how many days are now left, rather than months. I'm still debating how much suit cases we'll be taking along. Everyone says pack lightly so we'll have to be creative as I always over pack...

The 1st appointments after the holidays are this week and I am following 3 blogs. Two of them are adopting known children and one is a blind referral. We will be praying for these couples and let God take care of everything they will be facing. There is nothing better than God leading us through this adventure. He already has everything planned out for us and we just have to trust Him and see His love in everything.

More things to do...

2008-01-07T21:50:00.000-05:00

We've been pretty busy over the past month and all the holidays. Only 55 more days left till we leave and I am getting more nervous as the time goes on. I'm excited and can't wait for us to finally depart to Ukraine, but scared as to what all is going to happen once we get there. The unknown is killing me... I can't get room(s) ready for the kid(s) because we don't know whether it will be a boy or a girl or even both.

My husband on the other hand is completely relaxed and is ready to go anytime. I guess it's just me... or maybe all of us women out there. I have been following adoption blogs of other couples that will be traveling in Jan/Feb and am looking forward to reading about their experiences. I truly hope that younger children are available this spring so we can all come home with our child(ren). Supposedly, couples waiting for 2nd appointments will all be invited in Jan/Feb so hopefully SDA got new files that it is able to offer to couples that didn't get wanted referrals.

There is so much to do in the next 55 days... and there is not enough time to get everything done. Ahhh... where does time fly...

The Countdown started

2007-12-04T21:53:00.000-05:00

I haven't posted since July although we've been actively involved in the adoption process. We have our appointment date for March 6th - can't wait! I already started a list of things we want to get done and ready before we leave and let me tell you - I end up adding a thing or two almost every day. I also had to start a list of things to take along so we don't forget the little things.

We have our tickets purchased to depart from Washington DC on March 3rd and returning to US on April 14th - this gives us 5 weeks in Ukraine. Our facilitator is optimistic and hopes we get done the week of Apr 7th so we might be coming home even earlier, depending on how everything goes. As many people have said - Ukraine is so unpredictable so we'll have to go with the flow once we're there. I am the type of personathat hates unpredictability so this is going to be a big learning experience for me.

Since we don't know what age or gender we will be presented with at the SDA (although we requested a child(ren) under 4 yrs) - we can't buy cloth or furniture yet for the child(ren), so our relatives will be giving us hand once we know the details. So the countdown to our departure begins... I'm certain the time will fly by quick as it always does and we'll be that much closer to brining our future child(ren) back home.

2007-07-27T21:10:00.000-04:00

I finally decided to start our own blog. Thinking ahead... I know a lot of our relatives and friends will want to know what is going on while we're in Ukraine a few months from now.

I've been reading blogs of other families that are currently in Ukraine and the ones already home with the kids - what an unforgettable experience they all have to go thru!

Ruslan and I have been thinking about adoption for about a year before we formally decided to start the process this March. Ruslan is originally from Odessa, Ukraine and came to US 14 years ago with his parents. I am from Minsk, Belarus - came 11 years ago with my family. We are still a young couple - Ruslan is 33 and I am 26. We've been married for almost 9 years and have been very fortunate to have met each other at our church.

We are currently waiting for our dossier to be submitted to SDA. The lady we are working with - Tatiana - is supposed to be submitting it on Monday, July 30th so we are praying that she is able to do that. We started our paperwork in March and had a completed dossier except INS approval notice by the middle of May. I sent everything off to Tatiana for translation that week and we got our INS approval notice beginning of July. I then had to FedEx her the INS approval notice and everything is currently ready to go.

Speaking the same language - Russian - will definitely help us along the way in Ukraine but we will still need help getting paperwork stuff done while we're there. I hope SDA people will be nice to us, even though we are US citizens - we are still maintaining our culture and our language. We are hoping to adopt a boy or a girl or both if they are siblings under 4 years old. We originally wanted the youngest possible but after talking to a few people - we were told that when the child is young, it's very hard to tell if they will develop and grow to be normal. Every child has different background.. so the older the child, the more obvious it is how they're developing and what problems there might be. We just pray that God sends us a child or children that is/are His true gift. I come from a family of 4 kids and cannot imagine life without children. Although we've are very happy together - I know for sure that children will bring a different level of happiness to our lives.

There is so much more I want to write.. but I'll save it for later...