We've been home for a week now and couldn't be happier!!! We are enjoying every day with our cute little son.
I did not post much after the court because we couldn't disclose some information at that time. The director let us pick Victor up for good the day after our court. Due to the holidays, we wouldn't be able to pick up the court decree until May 5th which meant 2 more weeks after the court of daily visits and heartbreaking. Mommy and Victor were crying almost every time we had to leave each other... So we asked the orphanage director if she'd let us take him the day after court rather than wait 2 more weeks and she said yes. Our donation helped as well...
So the new phase of our bonding began on Apr 22nd. The 2 weeks we had with Victor prior to leaving Ukraine definitely helped us bond and get used to each other a great deal. He was very comfortable to go places as long as we were with him. The 1st tension we had was giving him a bath. He was hysterically crying and not wanting anything that had to do with water. He must have been traumatized by the bath taking at the baby house. I remember that he mentioned to us a couple times during our visits that "Vituy kupali" - Vitya was given bath.. and I didn't understand why he was saying that, but now I know - he was complaining to us and looking for comfort. We figured out that he'd be comfortable taking a bath with daddy so it wasn't just him in the water and it worked wonderfully. By the 3rd bath taking - we couldn't get him out of the shower and he'd want to get back in after I wiped him. The transformation was huge... what a little bit of improvisation can do...
We tried sticking to his orphanage schedule and their menu, but it wasn't working... especially the menu. He didn't want to eat the baby food I'd cook, he wanted to try everything we ate so we decided to let him try everything. He loved cucumbers, yogurt and bananas - he'd eat these unstoppable if he could. And he loved to drink a lot. Poor kiddo would drink as if this was the last liquid on earth. We never saw what and how he ate, but we think the food was pretty boring and he was very eager to try new things. He has allergy from some food or ingredient, but the orphanage doctor couldn't tell us what it was. He is getting some rash and redness once in a while on his cheeks and we're going to check this out at our 1st dr's visit. But we are not giving him any candies or things that are too sweet, or citruses.
Days with him went by pretty fast. We spent a great deal playing outside, riding motorcycle with daddy - yes... I even have videos to prove it... Victor was afraid of our motorcycle at the orphanage, but once he got close to it at home, touched it - he immediately directed Ruslan to pick him up and sit on the bike. He loved it so much - he wouldn't get off without a lot of crying and screaming. Eventually Ruslan put him in front on the bike and gave him a ride on the street - and Victor was not afraid a bit. This boy is going to be an adventurer! Same thing happened with cars - once he was inside, he didn't want to come out without crying. He is fine now because he feels and sees the consistency - we take him with us and he knows mama's car is going to be there forever and we can go whenever, no need for crying and demands...
Back to Ukraine... We were able to pick up the court decree and get Victor signed out of the orphanage on May 5th. The office of birth records was off that day, so we had to wait till May 6th - Tuesday - to get his new birth certificate. That took 1/2 day and we still had to get passport done the same day in order to make it home on the May 8th. As of 5 pm on May 6th - we still didn't know if we'd make it. If we didn't make it, we could have been in Ukraine a lot longer. I called Lufthansa to inquire about possible departure date change and they said everything was booked until May 20th. I was on the edge... We were in the country for over 60 days now and 2 more weeks was not what we needed.
Our facilitator called and said that passport would not be ready until May 7th - Wednesday and that almost broke my heart. That would mean that we wouldn't make it back to Kiev to get medical and visa done before our 2 pm flight on May 8th. I called her back and explained what Lufthansa told me and she had to call AVIR (passport) office back. Earlier that day she dropped off the application and "fees" but the lady didn't look how much our facilitator put in the envelope. When she called that lady back and explained how important it was for us to get the passport today - she said Ruslan can come and sign for the passport in 15-20 minutes. The "fees" in the envelope made a big difference. Ohh.. the news just made my day. Ruslan rushed on the motorcycle and made it just in time before they closed for the day. We had Victor's passport in our hands and were all ready to go.
We took an overnight train back to Kiev. He took it pretty well, was kind of excited to go on the train. Slept thru the night, but fell on the floor once so we had to put something underneath once side of the mattress so he doesn't roll to the floor. We were at the medical clinic before they open and were out of there on our way to Embassy by 11 am. We got everything dropped off at the Embassy and were told to come back for the visa the next morning.
We were going at 100 miles/hour just a day ago, and now everything seemed to finally calm down. We got done with the last paper chase and would be coming home very soon. As I said earlier, Victor was very good going everywhere since we were there all the way. We did have a few crying and legs kicking, but that is usually for a toddler. He did very well considering how many new things he saw and went through in the last few days.
We picked up his visa in the morning and took him to the SDA to drop off a copy of the court decree for their records. The psychologist - Oksana and her manager - Marina - were glad to see him. They knew very well what we had to go through and asked if we were still mad at the them. Of course we said no - there was a reason we had to go thru all the stress and pain - God had a plan for us to meet our son - Victor. After a brief meeting, we were off to the airport. The flight departed timely to Frankfurt and then we got on a flight to Washington, DC 15 minutes prior to departure. Victor slept half way through both flights, but barely ate anything. He was a bit cranky and that was understandable - it was after midnight Ukrainian time and he wasn't laying in his bed.
We made it to Washington on time, but it took us over an hr to get thru passport control and immigration. There were lines everywhere and not enough personnel to get everyone through. We were drained physically... I haven't slept for 2 nights and Victor was wanting to go everywhere he shouldn't... What a relief it was to come thru the doors and to see our family. We were met by my parents, my 2 sisters and one sister's husband, brother, our niece and Ruslan's mom. Ruslan's dad and stepmom were at our house waiting for everyone to arrive. Irina (our niece) gave Victor a handful of balloons, a teddy bear and an elmo cell phone. He didn't know what to do with himself - so many people were wanting to hug and kiss him, and he got gifts right away. Ohhh... It was a great feeling to see everyone and to finally touch down on American ground. It felt as if we were gone for a year rather than 2 months.
The drive home went pretty quick, although I kept falling asleep and waking up every so often. Ruslan drove us back - not sure how he had the energy.. but we made it home around 11 pm. Our house is a small ranch house, but it seemed so big, super clean and the best house in the world. Victor got so many gifts - full room of toys, full closet of cloth and of course the best grandpa's, grandma's, uncles, aunts and cousins in the world.
More updates from our 1st week home to come later.. Thanks everyone for following us throughout this journey and praying for us along the way.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
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4 comments:
Reading your account about those last days in Ukraine brings back so many memories of rushing around, getting to know your new child, etc. It's great you were able to take him from the orphanage earlier and it sounds like you've had great success in bonding already.
Keep posting when you can. It's such fun to read about the progress of all these children!
Congratulations! He is darling and definitely worth the crazy wait they put you through. We are happy to hear you are home safely. If you have a minute would you mind emailing me? I have a question about the "fees". We hope to be traveling in Sept ande were looking for a general idea of what is considered a "good fee". thanks! Monica monica.massie@agedwards.com
You will be so surprised how quickly the time spent in Ukraine will seem like a lifetime ago. We have been home almost as long as we were gone and I amazed at how fast the time has past!
I am so glad you are home with your son. He sounds so happy to be with you both! Enjoy him!!
congratulations... i am so happy for all of you!
enjoy being home...
best regards,
rachel
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